Libbingitup7275, 49

I have always had my doubts.... I have many friends and family who are religious,(mostly Christian Protestants)but I have found that there are way too many inconsistencies and improbabilities in Christian teachings that I just can't abide. I am not the arrogant, condescending type of atheist or agnostic that goes around insulting other's beliefs though. My beliefs f----uate between not feeling that there is a God at all and feeling that maybe there is some kind of divine force in existence. But one thing I feel certain about is that no organized religion on this planet has all the answers. Too much of what they teach just simply isn't true or feels false. I would love to go into detail about some of these things in a conversation sometime, but not here and now. I will say this though: If there is a divine being who is omnicient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and BENEVOLENT then why did my wife suffer and die a horrible death at age 26 leaving behind two infant sons who will never know her? Where was God when she suffered and died? Is he not omnipotent or just not benevolent?