Conniemiller, 61

I'm a woman (theist), in love with a man (atheist). I would like to learn the feelings/views of the subject of marriage. I'm not judgmental, very opened minded. I'm hurt, he says/acts as tho he loves me too. We have been together for nine years, but he won't commit because he says marriage is a christian matter. Why am I allowed to love him, but not be his wife?