Atheist Jokes

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[fireof12]

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species.

Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?"

"Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."

[fireof12]

` I was walking across a bridge one day and I saw a man standing on a ledge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said, "Stop! Don't do it!"

"Why shouldn't I?" he said.

"Well, there's so much to live for." "Like what?" "Well, are you religious?" He said yes. I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant." "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist." "Wow, me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God." "Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1789 or Reformed Baptist Church of God, 1915?"

He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said, "Die, heretic scum!!" And pushed him off the bridge.

[picco]

`good joke, do I have permission to post in the Connecticut Valley Atheists forum where I am an active member?

[tomwulf]

Some Christians walk into a bar, the Atheist behind them ducks.

[nbk (deleted)]

`A atheist known around his town as being a atheist is always being told he is going to hell. The teachers say it to him, his classmates say it to him, even his grandma says to him. His mother is troubled that he seems happy because of this so she asks his "little TJ why are you so happy at being told you're going to hell?" little TJ said "Because it means I get away from these @ssh*les"